Anonymous  U – January 15, 2023

Our young adult daughter has been doing okay managing ADHD, anxiety, bipolar depression, and ARFID eating disorder for several years. She has been on medication and works with a therapist. She was hospitalized in 10th gr, with suicidal ideation then completed PHP and IOP programs.  She returned to high school as a junior and was doing well until COVID shutdown. Then She began vaping nicotine, THC,  recreational marijuana and drinking alcohol despite psychiatrist warnings to avoid these substances.
Her Depression spiraled and at the age of 18 found a psychiatrist who approved her for a medical marijuana card to treat her anxiety in late  2021. Since starting MM She essentially stopped functioning, Quit work, school and driving and spent most of  her time in her room. She stopped eating and was vomiting daily.

In spring through July 2022 she was admitted to Newport residential treatment program for young adults. While she was away she received a diagnosis of borderline personality disorder, adjusted meds, was given a nicotine patch and my husband and I  completed 12 week DBT training for parents. She returned to our home in Sept 2022 with a contract to remain clean of substance use, attend MA meetings,  follow a daily routine, including self care, work and possibly consider taking a class at community college.

On a family vacation around Thanksgiving week 2022 she was withdrawn, irritable and behaving erratically and advised us that she stopped her meds a few weeks ago. She Left the hotel after midnight and was returned to our room an hour later by a motorist who found her wandering along the highway.  she admitted to suicidal ideation, and feeling unstable,  with fragmented thoughts/thinking. Vacation ended early.

She refused hospitalization and left the family home in early December full of anger and rage. She sent us a scathing text about leaving the family because we’re all toxic, she hates us and it’s our fault she has mental illness. Haven’t heard from her since but we’re aware she staying at a friends. She doesn’t want to be contacted so we’re giving her space.

We’re devastated and worried. We feel like her personality has completely changed and she hasn’t been the same since COVID shutdown and marijuana use starting back in 2020.

We’ve contacted the doctor and therapist sharing our observations and concerns altho due to HIPPA they cannot provide us with information. Feeling frustrated and sad with not being able to help our young adult  or if she would even talk to us and accept support. We fear we’ll lose her to homelessness or suicide. We feel as tho we lost her but have hope that she’ll return..

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